This week is the week of getting back to normal. Back to work full time, back to school full time, and just getting in the groove of things again. I have definately cherished these last few weeks and I am so grateful.

This morning I've been processing this thought of "The joy of the Lord is my strength". I think this is a huge motivation factor for me when I remember that it is the joy of the Lord that helps me through anything and everything. It is seeing Him smile and pleased that is helping me work hard day in and day out for His glory. It isn't about working for other people's favor or opinion, but working for the Lord knowing that His reward is far greater. Back to work I go and ready for a great day of work accomplishment and kingdom building at the same time.

"The eyes of the Lord are in every place, watching the evil and the good." Proverbs 15:3

"I, the Lord, search the heart, I test the mind Even to give to each man according to his ways, accoridng to the results of his deeds." Jeremiah 17:10

I think when we say stuff like "God is always watching you", it sounds creepy and you can get paranoid. You wonder what He thinks when He sees us and we think of the bad things we have done while He has been watching. But I started to think about how this Proverbs verse says that the Lord watches the evil and the good. He isn't just looking for the bad in everyone or in every place of humanity. He actually is looking upon us, seeing the good that we do. He sees us and enjoys that we do things with Him in mind and according to His word. As the Jeremiah verse says, He is going to search our heart and test our mind. He will examine both to see our motives and purity. Once again-this can be scary!! However, I believe that if you are doing what you ought to be doing than there is a blessing when God watches over you. He isn't just looking for what we do wrong. God is going to see your effort and your love for Him through your actions, your deeds. And it's not just what our heart is and what our words say, but it is through our deeds-what we do.

This is all interesting to me at this point in my life as I am living out a stance I took a long time ago, and have verbalized to many. It isn't just that God knows my heart and my mind in this, but now He is testing my deeds that are following my feelings and thoughts. The deeds are the thing that will show my faith and trust in God...and will be what He bases any blessing off of. Loving life!

I decided to blog for a second, before I get to work today and be productive. Life this week has been crazy unbelievable. The time has finally come and the moment I thought about for a long time is here. It has been surreal...to say the least (someone pinch me!) But i'm excited and looking forward to every day ahead. I wonder what my relationship with Jesus will be like from here on out. I have this whole new thing to talk to Him about. I think I will go to a new level of knowing Him under these new circumstances and I will see things differently now. I am just so happy about all of this. I can gush about it all I want but it still doesnt explain it all. I'm beaming....

I think we want to believe that we will be prepared and ready for life, no matter what happens. We can read all the books, listen to our Pastor, study the Bible...and we will be ready. I think we like to believe that we have the plan figured out, how it will go down, and what it will look like...and that nothing will change. There is this false reality that happens that says that you can be completely ready for life's next step and you won't face a stumble along the way because you are ready. I learned this with soccer...you can practice and prepare all you want for game day, but you never know what will happen during that game. There are too many variables that take place to be able to determine the outcome. It's not that you can downplay practice and preparation...these are very important things! You should do whatever you can to be ready for what's next-just know that things don't always go as planned or as expected.

I went to Omaha on Saturday and spent some time with my sister, Maegan. She is 3 years and 8 months older than me and we are the closest of the siblings. I don't get to see her as much with her married life and children, but when we do talk I never fail to gain perspective on something. We were talking about her life with all the responsibilities and tasks of marriage and children and the pressure of it all. She ended up saying that you will never be fully ready for marriage, no matter what you think. It's not that you can't be more prepared for it but you will never be able to understand married life until you are actually in it. This is something I've thought about recently. I think part of me wants everything to go perfect and have all my dreams come true with marriage. For instance...

We would meet, become best friends, court (and do it all the right way...pure, focused on God, examining each other, being realistic about the future), next is engagement, the wedding, and then we would move in together and have the HAPPIEST LIFE EVER! Ha. Not to forget that I will be 100% ready to be a wife, I will be an expert on marriage, somehow I will be able to be the best cook ever and be the best help-mate to my husband...and this will all come naturally!

Sounds nice...but it's a false expectation. Yes, I am going to be more prepared and ready than the average person my age and I can say that confidently. BUT, that doesn't mean I am anywhere close to knowing all about this stuff. So I don't know, its the whole expectations thing I suppose. You have to go in it remembering that it will be work at times and that we are doing it all with God's standard in mind. It is exciting, yet challenging at the same time. It is reassuring knowing that you will never be fully prepared for it, but I still want to do whatever to learn right now more and more while I am single.

Oh just some thoughts....casting them to Jesus! 1 peter 5:7.